I’ve been on a kitchen hiatus for the last couple days. I did try to make a sponge roll cake, but that didn’t work, so you are left with my thoughts for this post. No recipe today, sorry! But I do have a story – I hope you enjoy!
A hawk shrieked above me, swooping in front of the sun, creating a trembling shadow across my dusty face. Covering my eyes, I squinted up, tasting the salty sweat the dripped down my forehead. The armor felt heavy and I longed to shrug off it. I was sick of this metal cage, sick of this long dessert road, sick of this hateful loneliness. But this was dangerous country – the enemy held the land around the city. My mission was to get there. My footsteps lay forgotten behind me, mere imprints in the sand, waiting for a slight breeze to obliterate them. Those footprints symbolized the struggle of every step and at the beginning, the flippant removal of them angered me. I didn’t care anymore. I welcomed any breeze that broke up the hot stillness that had settled over the dusky dunes. Ignoring the hawk as it called again I wondered, why had I think this would be a good idea? I wiped my face again, clenching my fists in frustration. I had chosen this mission. I had chosen my armor. I had said I was ready. My eyes narrowed in frustration. It shouldn’t be this hard! I had underestimated this dessert walk. It was no walk. It was a fight.
I have always wanted to enter the stories of epic heroes, overcoming all odds to make sure good prevails over evil. My idea of triumph was scaling the mountain castle to defeat the evil knight or hand to hand combat over fantasy lands and creatures. Unfortunately, I’m the real deal in the 21st century. But you know what? As a Christian, I’ve started a journey that is not just a walk. It’s a fight. A fight against a real evil that wants to see me writhing in defeat.
I can’t defeat the feelings of insecurity on my own. As I see photos of models and athletes, I want to give up and succumb to the thoughts that I’m not good enough or pretty enough or strong enough. Or when I find myself having to make choices about the future, it is much easier to think about everything that could go wrong instead of all that could go right. Insecurity pricks me when I’m tired of thinking and fighting. It capitalizes on every opportunity to tear me down. And I let it. See guys, it is my choice to let insecurities define my thoughts and actions. But I have the battle plan – put on the full armor of God and He will equip and protect me. When I trust in the sword of the spirit and the promises of the Bible, no scheme of Satan can bring me down. So really, I am a modern day knight, only I think me and my fellow soldiers have an adversary even more dangerous than dragons and monsters. The difference is, me and my fellow soldiers also have a God who is going to win.
So there you go – my contribution to a real English blog post this week 😉 Thanks for reading!